Well Today I had a job interview for a position within my current company. It's not offering me much more than my current position but it is offering more thn my current position and is a step up the old corporate ladder.
I don't know if I'll get it or not but it was one of many steps forward. I've also decided that I'm going to look more into Navy OCS. I know some of my family might not agree with the decision but I think it might be what I need to move forward. I know the officer pool for the areas I want to go into ( aviation and intelligence ) are highly competitive but I think I could be happy doing surface operations as well. As I talked to one of my friends in the Marine Corps,( he is an academy grad and has just been promoted to 1st Lt.) I started to realize that maybe this might be a good move for me. I want to do a lot in life and I also want to give back. Likewise I don't like to half ass anything so I'm going on all cylinders on this. I want to be the best officer I can be if I can make it through the slection process. Likewise for as tough as OCS is I heard that your first assignement tends to be the roughest because you have an extremely sharp learning curve as a junior officer. My Marine corps buddy gave me the basics, lead by example, treat your team with respect, ask questions and for advice "getting up to speed" from your NCO's and learn to do your job to the best of your ability. Essentially the skills for life and of any mnagement position. If I absolutely hate it I know that I can seperate after 4 years with some of my student debt handled and the feeling that I did my duty to my country, if I love it well then I picked one hell of a career, granted it's definitely better to be single when you are out on 6 month deployments.... One of my sisters knows a JAG in Newport and said she help me get some more info on enlisting into the officer ranks. For more on this stay tuned Bob could be becoming Ensign Amighty in 2010....
On the training front I'm back up to doing 4000 yards in the pool 3-4 times a week and when it's not bitterly cold I'm managing to get out for at least 2 runs. I've been hitting the weights and just trying to build strength. I'm about 15 lbs over my ideal weight so I need to start taking steps to get myself back.
I don't really have a race schedule planned just because my future is just so cloudy. I've guess that's why I felt so helpless, I've been crawling around in the dark with out a flashlight. I don't know where I'll be in June or July and right now racing just seems so distant from all the problems I've had to deal with in the past few months. I'd love to keep my streak of race finishes at Patriot and Providence alive like wise part of me is sort of itching to do Rev3 as it was in my own back yard. Another part of me wants to do Ironman but I need to stay serious. I have a lot of bills to handle, and depending on wht path I go down I might not have the time or the money to devote to all the sporting endeavors I want to do. I have to fly by wire and play it by ear but I know I'll gracing a few finish lines this year.
Right now I need to get some focus I need to pick a path follow and not look back. As my conversation with my Buddy the Lt. ended it ended on us talking about courage: Courage is not foolishly looking for a fight, it is not about having no fear. Hell courage is being damn terrified, it's being scarred out of your mind and leaping into the unknown but showing the determination and fortitute to do what has to be done.... I think it's time I show a little courage.