Upon looking at my poll results, it looks like Ironman Arizona is in the cards if I can get a general entry slot in November, I've been crunching the numbers to see if a New Zealand/ Arizona double is in the mix or would be fiscal suicide, upon review I might be able to swing it if Catherine and Jo Ann could tolerate putting my hairy arse up for two weeks, if I make Kona, I will have to sell vital organs, my car and soul or my parents real estate gig will have to take off pronto ( granted it will anyway, the active adult community has given them 2 deals and at least 3 prospects) but my dad's promise rings in my ears " You earn a Kona slot and we'll find a way to get you there." Needless to say my escape from number crunching my bills and earnings, has been number crunching flights and hotels in Taupo, along with Flights, hotel, and rental car arrangements to Tempe and the Big Island, with my earnings. Bjoern said he'd be down for Tempe so splitting a hotel and rental car could make it a very, very, managable trip if we can both get general entry. Park City at this point is looking more and more like it's in the scrap heap, and I'm trying to tuck enough away for Nutmegman. I never thought I'd say I miss the sprints and olympics, but upon looking at my calendar and finding a majority of my races have been halves, I have to say I kind of miss the variety I had last year. For as stressful as 2007 was 2008 has been more so. I hadn't been able to really enjoy the time leading up to my races. Financial worries plauged me from the day after Nutmeg up until my flight to Taupo. Every race the worries would hit, do I have enough for gas, bills, hotel, food. I've only had one podium technically 2 if I went AG, but anytime I can get a shot in the elite I'll take it. I've found that my family and friends definitely have great faith in my ablities, for my realatives to pool resources and lend me cash to compete, it speaks volumes, especially in our situation.
All I can do to get through the montony of work and bills, is train and plan for the next race. To qoute from one of my favorite movies , Rudy, " Dreams are what make life tolerable." Most of my life I've been told I don't dream enough, I try to stay in the concrete, what I can do today, what I've gotten in the past. Recently I've been dreaming a little too much, but unlike a lot of dreamers I realize dreams are only achieved through hard work and follow through. I can't sit on my ass and expect to do a sub-10:30 Ironman and qualify for Kona , I can't sit at a desk pissing and moaning expecting it's going to get me out of debt and put a bachelor's degree in my hand. Positive energy goes only halfway, the other half you have to put out. With all the negative that's been circling in my life lately I've been trying to get upbeat, I plan, and I execute. I take some risks, put myself out there, I've almost thought of going for and FHA loan to buy investment property in popped bubble markets (even though they're cheap my debt to income sucks right now and I know it. So that will wait until I'm making more than $19k and pocketing $15k after taxes, 401k and benefits. It could pay dividends other wise I will have a vacation home in Florida....and California... and Nevada.... to sell/rent at cut throat prices.)
All the fiscal shit aside, one reason I have NZ for 09 is the fact I want to have one last crack at Kona as an 18-24 AG athlete, Tempe is game over for that AG ( granted I expect to be riding like Hell on Wheels because I will have more favorable training conditions.) because it's a qualifier for 2010 in which I'd be entering the slightly more competitive 25-29 bracket, against former collegiate swimmers and runners, also despite it's the 25th Anniversary, IMNZ is slow to sell out, where as IMAZ could be an equally expensive endeavor if I log on to my PC late and miss the General Entry ( then the debate is do I go with a community fund slot? or buy a training package with Entry and training camp from Multisport.com) If I don't get to Kona by 30 I'm giving up on the dream to go pro, because by that point I will have to be going pro speed to qualify in my age group. Part of me embraces risk, my parents tried to play it safe and ended up in deeper shit than if they took risks in their careers, in investment, in life in general. They have often told me to live opposite of the way they lived, maybe one of the reasons as I begged my dad to talk me out of IMNZ 09 he encouraged me to get my shit handled and do it. Indeed upon looking at the battering I've taken this year I'm not too bad off, a couple of things got /are getting paid late, had some major scares but by September I'll be all square, life will be back to normal, granted I'll still be crashing with Grandpa. Well I've gone on like Mac Beth, speaking "the tale of an idiot ,a lot of sound and fury signifying nothing."- Bill S. My hope for 09 is that by the time August rolls around I will have my degree in hand, and gainful entry level career, an emerging coaching business, and some 20 year olds pissing themseleves with fear on the big island, because my lycra clad prosterior chain will be making its way to the start line in Kona.
Paying his dues, bearing his scars and getting tougher by the second.